Skipping dinner
by Ade321
Summary: My answer to the ephemeral challenge. It seems my muse enjoys a good challenge, but would let me keep this under 1000 words. Not mine, but enjoying the fun. Babe.


"So what happened next?" Lula and Connie asked at the same time, leaning over the desk.

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "You know my mom. She wouldn't let Grandma give me the latest on Ralph Bernini until I agreed to go out with this guy she had her eyes on for me. Since the bond forfeits tomorrow, I didn't have any choice but to say yes."

"Who is this guy?" Connie asked.

"He's my uncle Pip's neighbor's hair-dresser's first cousin or something like that. He works in finance. He was twitchy all night and at some point when the waiter almost spilled his wine, I thought he would punch him."

"So, it was a bad date?"

"I'm not sure I'd say that." But not for the reasons they might think.

"What do you mean?" they both said at the same time again. "Did you get lucky? You don't look like you got lucky, though you do look happy." Lula narrowed her eyes and leaned closer, carefully scrutinizing my face as if to detect any trace of post-orgasmic glow I might be trying to hide from them. "Nope, she didn't get any last night", she finally declared.

I glared. "Would you stop that? How is it that the whole town knows when I get lucky? Uh, don't answer that, I don't need to know."

"I think you need to start at the beginning with your date. What's his name anyway?"

"His name is Matt. Matt something-or-other, I don't remember exactly. He picked me up at my apartment and boy was I surprised. I would've thought with the amount of stalkers I've had over the years, my mom would know not to give my home address and phone number to just anyone, even a potential boyfriend. Anyway, he showed up with a bunch of flowers, dressed to the nines and with a grin on his face. I don't know exactly what my mom told him or what she promised, but he looked hopeful. We went to Rossini's."

"And then?"

"He seemed to know Bobbi, so we were seated fast, in the good section. I was thinking that the evening might turn out not to be so bad in the end, despite the fact that my mom had found the guy and not me. But then, he made his mistake. He ordered for both of us!" I exclaimed, still feeling the indignation from the night before.

"That's a mistake?" Connie asked, puzzled.

"It is when you order fettuccini alfredo for yourself, a goddamn garden salad for your date! His only saving grace at that point was dessert. He ordered a tiramisu and a black coffee. Turned out, the tiramisu was for him. He said he didn't like a fat girlfriend."

"Oh boy" the choir intoned again.

"Yeah. By that point, I was thinking of clocking him and leaving him there with his fettuccini, but I didn't think my mom would give me Bernini's whereabouts unless I actually stayed throughout the whole date. Conversation wasn't much. He was more concerned with trying to see down my dress." We all rolled our eyes at that one. Men.

"And then?"

"And then all went to Hell in a hand basket. First Morelli showed up. And then Ranger."

"What?!" They both exclaimed.

"Yeah. Morelli was there with his latest date but let me tell you, I think he saw more of me that of his date. He was glaring over non-stop. Luckily though, his date got pissed and they left before we could finish our dinner."

"You said Ranger showed up after that? Boy your life sure is exciting. When are you leaving?"

"Leaving?" I asked confused.

"He's not sending you to a third-world country for stepping out on him? Or is he sending lover-boy Matt instead? On second thought, I'd send Matt for sure. That way, he'd have free access to you, without no finance lover-boy intruding." Lula declared.

I was getting close to Rhino by now. "I was not stepping out on him! You have to be in an actual relationship to do that. We weren't there, yet." I snapped my mouth closed and hoped they'd let it go.

"Yet?!" Of course they zeroed in on my slip. Connie's eyes were huge and Lula was leaning over the desk again, checking my face a second time.

"No, we weren't in a relationship when I agreed to go out with Matt."

"But you are now?"

"Maybe" I answered coyly.

"How'd you get from finance guy to that walking daydream in the course of the same dinner?"

"Well, we made it through the main course, and I was struggling to keep down the black coffee he ordered for me, while trying not to jump across the table and rip the tiramisu out of his hands, when I felt someone behind me."

"Ranger." Lula guessed and I nodded. "Forget reality shows, I'm not watching them no more. Your life has all the drama I'll ever need." Lula exclaimed.

"Don't I know it." I remembered seeing him standing there, blanked faced, but radiating anger. He was dressed for bear and had reached with one hand and grabbed Matt by the collar. "Turns out Matt was a fugitive and finance was a fancy way of saying he swindled people out of their life savings. I guess my mom didn't tell him I was a bounty hunter and he didn't seem interested in asking what I did for himself. He mostly talked about what a great catch he was." He didn't seem so sure of himself face to face with a pissed-off Ranger. For a guy who started shaking and crying for help as soon as the cuffs came on, I didn't think he warranted the kidney jabs Ranger gave him. I guess he was crying too hard to see where he was going when he walked right into the door jamb. Twice. Then tripped down the stairs. By that point, Tank had taken over and Ranger was coming back to get me.

"What happened then?"

"I plopped back down at the table and ordered myself a large fettuccini and a double side of tiramisu."

"No, I mean, what happened with Ranger?"

"He came back for me and sat with me while I ate." What actually had happened was a bit more interesting.

_He'd come back still shooting daggers at everyone who dared to look at me and stopped near my chair. "What are you doing?" _

_"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm having dinner." I was light-headed from hunger and the two glasses of wine I'd had while trying not to strangle Matt and I was well passed angry. _

_"You just had dinner" he bit back._

_"I didn't have dinner. I had a salad! A salad! And then the twit just sat there eating his tiramisu, while he ordered coffee for me. Black. No cream. No sugar. Just goddamn bitter black coffee. So, I'm having dinner, that's what I'm doing."_

_"What were you doing with that guy?" he was still angry, but now you could see a trace of amusement in his eyes. _

_"Does it really matter? I was on a date. Why do you care?" I asked._

_"Of course it matters. I told you. I love you."_

_"What type of love are we talking about? There's lots of types of love. I love cake. I could never say no to a piece of cake. Do you love me like I love cake?"_

_"Not that ephemeral". I'm sure I looked confused because he then added. "You love cake for ten minutes while you eat it. I love you a whole lot longer than that."_

_"You do?" I was frozen, my fettuccini forgotten._

_"I do" he said simply._

_"What does that mean? Where do we go from here?"_

_"I was hoping you'd go out with me for starters. We'll take it one day at a time after that."_

_"I'd like that" I whispered back._

_His face darkened again. "Babe, I can't do the back-and-forth you had with Morelli. You're mine and I'm yours and I don't share. I don't want you to go on dates with other guys."_

_I sighed. "I didn't chose to go out with this guy. I was trying to get information on Bernini."_

_"From my skip?" Ranger asked confused._

_I sighed again. I'd been doing a lot of that lately. "From my Grandma. It's a long story. My mom wouldn't let her tell me where to find Bernini, unless I went out with Matt. I don't know where she finds them. First Dave the serial killer, then Matt the fraudster."_

_Ranger was smiling. "Babe, your mom is something else." I couldn't agree more._

_I finished my dinner and Ranger took me home, holding my hand the whole time. "Does this count as our first date?" I asked when we were in my parking lot._

_"I guess it does, but I'm hoping the next one won't involve any takedowns"._

_"Where's the fun in that? We're not exactly the traditional type of people." We were in my lobby at this point, Ranger having checked my apartment for any intruders. He moved closer into my space, my back pressed against the wall and his eyes locked on me. _

_"No, we're not" he said as his lips came down on mine. His kiss was intense, but then again, his kisses always were. His lips went to just below my ear and he whispered "I'll see you tomorrow night" and he was gone. Five minutes later, I was still standing dazed in my lobby, trying to figure out how the date from hell had turned out so well._

"That's it?" Lula asked bringing me back to present. "He stayed for dinner and now you're in a relationship? Honey, even I didn't kid myself like that when I was engaged to Tankie. We were actually dating."

"He asked me out on a date and we agreed to be exclusive, so I'd call that the beginning of a relationship" I glared back.

"Somehow I get the feeling you left the good stuff out of the story" Connie said.

"You'll have to get the rest from Ranger" I said as I picked up my stack of folders and hurried out of the office before they could shoot another question at me.


End file.
